June 22 - Colossians 3:18-21

June 22 - Colossians 3:18-21

“Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.”

If you know me very well, you know that when Paul starts telling women to submit to their husbands, I tend to react.  Sometimes I think Paul simply needed a wife to tell him when it was a good idea to just be quiet.

First a story, though.  In the 70s, mom and dad were doing fine, but she had been reading all of this stuff about how women were supposed to submit to their husbands. (Know that she told this story over and over – I’m not telling tales out of school.)  She decided to try an experiment.  If all went well, she would transform her life and her marriage.

She became quite a submissive wife, allowing Dad to make all of the decisions, never arguing with him, having meals prepared when he walked in the door, ensuring that the three of us were doing everything possible to give Dad the perfect life at home. This went on for a week or so.  Dad loved it and was smart enough to not question why mom was acting completely out of character.  His life had suddenly gotten quite wonderful.  There was no dissension in the house and he could do whatever it was that he wanted.

After a couple of weeks, mom could barely stand herself any longer. Not only had she chosen to be submissive, but she had stripped away every part of her personality to be what she thought Dad wanted her to be.  And to be honest, Dad was waiting for the other shoe to drop, knowing that this wasn’t going to last forever.  He also knew that he hadn’t married a quiet, docile woman.  She had quit challenging his ideas and actions and wasn’t acting like the normal woman he married.  While he was getting his way, he was also getting bored and mom was quietly becoming miserable.  Let’s also add in here that it was no picnic for the three of us kids.  You can only contain kids for so long.  We were about at our end.

Trust me when I say that everything finally came to an explosive head and fire lit out throughout the family.  When it was all over, both Mom and Dad realized what fools they had been, trying to become something that on the surface seemed like a good idea, but in reality would never work.

These verses are all about respect and honoring those people in our lives that are around us.  It isn’t a call to change our personality so that we fit scripture. Paul simply wasn’t that stupid (though at first blush, sometimes he sounds that way).  Before we spend too much time worrying that he is calling us to lay down our minds and become Stepford Wives, we need to take a moment to understand what it is that he is really calling us to do. 

He has just talked about the virtues of being God’s chosen people, covering ourselves in love, letting peace in our hearts and the word of Christ in our lives.  This not only applies to our relationship with the church, but with our family and friends as well.